


Gone

by jbird181



Series: 13 Days of Falling in Love [6]
Category: The Librarians (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Funerals, Grief, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 07:51:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9593810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jbird181/pseuds/jbird181
Summary: Stone is trying his best to hold it together after Cassandra dies. Ezekiel is decidedly less successful.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Day 6: Grief

Stone squeezes his hands together to hide the shaking. _She was supposed to have more time._ The doctors had said so. Cassandra was supposed to have _years_ , they had _plans_ , they were going to go to college together, study physics and archaeology respectively, get an apartment together once they graduated, all of that gone.

 

 _Now what?_ Even when Stone was unsure of what he wanted from life in the past, Cassandra was his north star. She was his best friend.

 

_Gone._

 

“If anyone would like to say a few words, please come up now,” calls the pastor. Some people get up, others shifting their legs to let them pass through the aisles.

 

Stone doesn't. 

 

If he tries to speak, he knows he’d break down, and he can't do that. Not now.

 

The people speaking were mostly kids Stone didn’t know, and apparently they hadn’t known Cassandra very well either. They barely scrape the surface, throwing out basic character traits: sweet, kind, friendly.

 

Stone hates them a little bit.

 

“Cassandra was… Cassandra was the nicest person I know. When I moved here, she was really welcoming and all, and…” the current speaker’s voice breaks on the last word, and Stone’s head shoots up. It's Ezekiel Jones, an obnoxious junior Cassandra had befriended. He's sarcastic and loud and overall, Stone doesn't understand why Cassandra likes him. _Had_ liked him. “And she’s dead. She’s fucking dead, and she’s not coming back, and we can chat about how nice Cassandra was, and how beloved, and, and, you know, but she’s dead! It’s not fair.”

 

Stone can't do anything other than stare, because Ezekiel might as well have been reading his mind. His chest tightens with identical fury, because this entire facade is  _so stupid_.

 

“Cassandra’s dead,” Ezekiel chokes out. “She’s not ‘in a better place’ or any of that shit. She’s _gone._ ” He's crying now, wiping away tears with jerky movements. Ezekiel continues to talk, but Stone can no longer make out the words through Ezekiel’s sobs. An awkward silence falls over the congregation, and as a result his crying echoes through the pews.

 

Without really thinking about it, Stone stands up and hurries to the front. “Sit down. Come on, Jones.” He sets a hand on Ezekiel’s shoulder, and he shakes it off, head in his hands. “Sit down.” Ezekiel gives in and lets himself be guided off the dais, past the pews and the fellow mourners trying to hide their glances, eyes judgemental. _Assholes._

 

Finally, Stone gets Ezekiel outside and onto a bench overlooking the parking lot. He's still crying, and, if he was honest, Stone is starting to get a little annoyed by it. If anyone has the right to cause a scene, it's Stone.

 

Ezekiel rests his elbows on his knees and sinks down onto them, chest heaving. He's breathing too fast. Stone puts an experimental hand on Ezekiel’s back, who doesn't move away, which Stone takes as a good sign. He looks at the field next to the parking lot as Ezekiel collects himself. That was a funny term, like you could gather up all of your broken pieces and display them in a museum. “What now?”

 

Stone has been asking himself that very question. All he wants was to go home and sleep, to forget for a while, but he can't just leave Ezekiel here. There's no telling what he might do. He sees his same exhaustion reflected back in Ezekiel’s eyes. “We’re going back to my house.”

 

“Hold on, _we_?”

 

“Yeah.” Stone stood up. “Come on.”

 

Ezekiel comes.

***

Stone pours two mugs of chamomile-mint tea and stirs in some honey. He gives Ezekiel, who's  sitting at his kitchen table, one of the mugs, the other he takes a sip out of. The tea burns his tongue, but the aroma is soothing.

 

Ezekiel wraps his hands around his cup and stares down at it. “I still can’t believe she’s gone.”

 

Stone fights the urge to bang his head into the table and makes an agreeable noise in response.

 

“It’s not fair.”

 

“I _know_ ,” Stone mutters. Ezekiel isn't saying anything that hasn't been constantly running through Stone’s head since Cassandra collapsed. Stone’s not his damn therapist.

 

Ezekiel slams his mug down on the table. “Why don't you care?!”

 

“Of course I care!”

 

“Then why aren't you reacting? Why aren't you doing anything?!”

 

“What do you want me to do, Ezekiel?! She’s dead, alright? Cassandra’s dead and there’s nothing I can do to bring her back, but someone around here’s got to keep it together!” Spent, he puts his head in his hands and leans on the table like it's the only stable thing in his life.

 

Ezekiel looks back down at his tea, fingers clenched. “I’m sorry.”

 

And it's not okay. Stone’s afraid nothing will ever be okay again. And all of a sudden he's crying, everything he’s held back all day rushing out in a torrent of hopelessness. Distantly, he recognizes that Ezekiel is touching his shoulder, and then he pulls Stone in and lets him sob on his chest. Stone’s entire world is reduced to _she’s gone she’s gone she’s gone_ and a hand rubbing his back.

  
It’s not okay. Nothing’s okay. But at least Ezekiel understands.

**Author's Note:**

> On second thought, I should've gone with a silly funeral hook-up instead.


End file.
